Ahhh, thinking is a good thing. Worrying and creating more worry by thinking is not. I have to come to the conclusion that life is the way it is. You cannot change a lot of what is going on around and to you. I have changed things in the past - but they were changeable. Location. Jobs. Loves. Friends. They can all be changed but illness cannot. You need to try to get better, but if you're feeling so sick that you cannot manage to do what is necessary to be healed, then you are caught in that I would, but I can't, so I won't, therefore I won't be able to feel better. People ... take care of yourselves. Quit smoking, exercise, eat light and right. Life is short. Don't make it shorter.